Stop #2: The Buttery

Just got back from the buttery and I smell like heaven. I've been home for less than 20 minutes and Tony informs me that he's already taken a shower. I think I'm just going sit for a moment and enjoy life. Mmmmmmm life smells good.

If you've never been to the Buttery, it's definitely worth your while to have a visit at least once. I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing, but you won't find that smell anywhere else. The friendly cook tells me they have the best coffee around. Farmer Brother's (? I think)......it was alright. But I'm not here to talk about coffee. This is a slinger blog.

After sliding a delicious looking plate of food in front us, the cook comments: “I don't know how you guys can eat that stuff”. Not what I'd like to hear from someone who just made my dinner, but then she confesses, “ohh, I've never eaten one”. Ppsshhh what the hell does she know!!! (she's from Florida)

Anyways, in all seriousness, the Buttery is not the cleanest diner around, but the slinger was yummy. The cook supplied us with all the condiments: hot sauce, ketchup and...mustard. I've never seen nor heard of anyone putting mustard on their slinger, but apparently her ex did it all the time. I gave it a try and it actually wasn't terrible. I probably won't do it again though. I think the best part of this slinger is how they cook the hash browns in the little metal ring. It comes out like a patty and they're perfect! The cheese was a slice of american ripped in half and set on top to melt on the chili.

Out of the first 2 slingers, this one is the champ. I give it a 7.5

Tony's Review:
Holy shit this place is a dump. The smell overwhelms you, 100 years of grease line the walls and three old ladies walk out leaving the place empty except for the cook.

Aside from these sensory setbacks the slinger was pretty good. The chili was probably canned but whatever it was it got better with each bite. Hashbrowns were almost cooked in a patty shape so they were nice and thick, the burger patty was frozen but did the job. One negative and it could just be a personal thing but the slinger was sectioned off: burger on the left, hash browns in the middle and eggs to the right with the chili on top. I prefer what the experts call a "garbage pile" where all of the garbage is stacked on top of each other for maximum flavors.

Overall I would give this slinger a 7, even though the minute I got home I took a shower and burned my clothes. If you do go to the Buttery don't where anything you like because that shit will stink forever.

Stop #1: Courtesy Diner (Kingshighway)

Hello Fans,
We've been looking forward to this day for a while now and it's finally here. There's been some debate on where to find the best slinger, so in few months it'll all be solved. The rules have been set and we're staying consistent with what's in our slinger for the best comparison. For a long time I went with the sausage option for meat. Years ago I had a bad experience when I was in the middle of enjoying a slinger and I bit into a hamburger patty that wasn't cooked all the way. I don't think anyone can enjoy a slinger with raw beef in there. I'm not real big on second chances but time has past and I have forgiven hamburger so I decided to stick with the traditional slinger: over easy eggs, hash browns, hamburger, chilli, cheese and onions. 

Tim's Review: 

Courtesy Diner (Kingshighway) was a good start to the tour. A real classic slinger. There was a jalapeño option, which isn't that common, so I left that out. The chili was nothing magical, but it did it's job. The hamburger turned out to be a pleasant surprise and definitely took away any worries I had about giving it a second chance. My only real problem with this slinger were the hash browns. Way over done! I'm fine with the hash browns getting a little crispy on the outside but my slinger was super crunchy. In fact, there's a lot of times when I don't mind my food being a little over done: I don't mind a little burnt popcorn, or a little crispy tortilla for my quesadilla and I like my hot dogs black!! (the blacker the dog, the sweeter the juice...right?), but this was way too much for me. They were almost like those little french fry sticks that come in the can. It's not that those are terrible, but I just don't want them in my slinger. 

So with that in mind I'll give the Courtesy Diner slinger a 6.5. Overall a decent slinger, but the hash browns just didn't cut it. 

Tony's Review: 

We wanted to start off with a true slinger and we made a good choice. Courtesy has a great diner atmosphere and the perfect diner menu. I would agree with most of the points that Tim made: over easy eggs are over easy eggs, nothing really to screw up, the chili was average, I thought the hamburger was very mediocre and was obviously frozen and the hash browns were definitely too well done (which is a rarity in my experience).

The Courtesy Diner slinger is a definite classic and a great standard for slingers, but in a tour to find the greatest it is in the middle of the road. I give this puppy a 6.25.

Dear Team USA,

A boy has a childhood dream to become an astronaut. That boy's mother tells him to shut up and clean his room. That boy grows up, becomes a Pepsi® delivery driver and has a knack for eating garbage food. That man has a friend (works at a copy store that rhymes with Stinkos) who also loves garbage food. Together they form a blood pact to tour the great city of St. Louis in search of "The One." Of course I'm talking about the great American slinger.

The world's greatest breakfast food, believed to be first assembled by an escaped lunatic, consists of hash browns, breakfast meat, two eggs, chili and preferably topped with cheese and onions. Our search begins soon and invite you to stay for the wheelchair ride of your life!

Sincerely,

Tony and Tim