Stop #54: Ivory Coast Bistro

Tony's Review: Months ago when we ate at Melt we passed Ivory Coast Bistro and they had a board outside that said, "Today's Special: Slingers!" Great. Another place to eat at. Well fast forward to the present, we go to the Ivory Coast Bistro to get a slinger we find out that they don't have one and they only did that special ONE TIME! What the fuck man. Already this slinger sucks. We ask the waitress if they can make us one special, you know since we're big time, then she tells us the kitchen doesn't know what goes on a slinger!!! We should of walked out but due to our extreme professionalism we explained what a slinger was and out came the Ivory Coast Bistro.

It didn't look like a total piece of shit when it came out so I give them bonus points for that. The chili was plentiful and it was rich as hell, dare I say too rich? That's about were the excitement ends unfortunately; sausage, hash browns and the eggs were all really basic and didn't bring anything to the plate.

For not knowing what a slinger is the kitchen did an ok job treating some VIPs right. But at the end of the day there is a probably a good reason why they don't offer this on the menu full time. I'm sure the rest of their breakfast is good but for the time being I have no desire to head back to Ivory Coast Bistro.

Tim's Review: What the hell would you expect when you have to give the waitress instructions on how to cook your food? This thing basically sucked. But I mean that in the nicest possible way. It's not their fault that we asked them to make something they don't really make. They should have just said, “sorry fellas, we don't serve slingers here”, and that would have been the end of it. I guess I should just be grateful that they were nice enough to make this crappy meal for us.

It did actually look like a pretty legit slinger when they brought this thing out. All the right ingredients were there, under a big sloppy pile of chili. Unfortunately, none it was making me want more. I guess given the circumstance, it was exactly what I should have expected. I could have bought all these ingredients myself and made this thing at home. The only thing that really bummed me out was that sausage. It was the rubbery little hockey puck style that you get sick of halfway through the first bite. Oh and I almost forgot, I'm not sure what kind of coffee they served, but it was some of the worst coffee I've ever had. If there was a coffee hall of shit, this place might be at the top of this list.

So considering the fact that this slinger was made on the fly, it actually wasn't the worst one we've ever had. What does that say about City Diner, Uncle Bills, and those other turds in the hall of shit?! How bad must they suck when the Ivory Coast can toss a slinger together at a moments notice and not suck as bad as them? Congratulations Ivory Coast for not making it in the hall of shit.